That's like number two on the check list for, "It's OK to takeoff!" It is considered a seminal novel of the Beat Generation, famed for their informal style, and these are some of the most famous quotes from this philosophically chronicled journey. The high road is hard to take, and it seems unfair that you have to be the one to travel it alone. At the end of the battle, the servant comes up and says, "Before the battle, you said to bring you your red shirt. Yeah, I get the one pilot in America, "We're going to Vegas, give me 5 bucks, we'll be alright." Like in the Mussawi case, if I were to set the execution date, I would set it for 1 a.m. on the day we set clocks forward. I gotta get Scooter to Level 9! The Web's Largest Resource for Famous Quotes & Sayings. There's nothing I can do about it, so I just keep playing my Game Boy. All of a sudden, the pilot comes on. Road Trip Quotes. Jeff Foxworthy: Now, I'm sure alot of you are going, "Jeff, I don't know, when it comes to clothes, if I dress like a supermodel, or a redneck." I got mud on my new boots. Easily move forward or backward to get to the perfect clip. Enjoy these general road trip quotes from a variety of famous authors, musicians, and poets. I look at this turd, which looks like it says something. I … So he gets the captains red shirt, and the captain puts it on. ", Jeff Foxworthy: You ought to be wearing one that says "I whipped anorexia's ass.". "I'm saving money. ", Bill Engvall: [laughs] Okay, how big a loser are you, stomping around your yard? Bill Engvall: Here's the problem: I'm an impulse buyer. ", Bill Engvall: For about two weeks after that, my wife and I would be sitting at the breakfast table and there would be two or three coyotes sitting watching the back yard. He's probably looking for his bug family! [puts his wrists together as if he is asking to be handcuffed] "Take me to jail. Found a fork in the road the other day. “I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s on my list.” – Susan Sontag (Tell me about it.) Can you believe how dirty it is? Welcome back. He said "The... the problem is this thing has rendered her unable to speak." Stop begging for booze! the only survivors are the parrot and the magician and their floating out in the middle of the ocean on two little peices of wood and the parrot goes "Alright i give up. Don't tell me we don't got enough gas on the plane. Our favorite collection of He had to leave a New Year's Eve party to be here tonight. “Good company in a journey makes the way seem shorter”. Sluggo has eaten and shat whole a golf glove, velcro and all. Ron White: If I'm standing on line to get on a plane and the guy in front of me needs two loads of phlegm to pronounce his name, I'm checking his shoes for fuses! Jeff Foxworthy: She would not shut up the entire time. Detailed quotes explanations with page numbers for every important quote on the site. ", and she says, "So he don't got to bend his neck to eat!" I just saw him licking his own ass! He goes "All right. Larry The Cable Guy: This doctor says to this feller, "i got bad news and worse news." He said "Also, it's made her incontinent. I bought a deer feeder." But Peck’s extraordinary book – more than anything I’ve ever read – deserves that accolade. While profound, inspirational road trip quotes are great, we all need a giggle sometimes! Rate it: (0.00 / 0 votes) at the end of the road: No longer living. I pick it up out of the yard every morning.". Easily move forward or backward to get to the perfect clip. Goes outside to poop, cleans it right up! Larry The Cable Guy: [about a photo of Ron from the 70s] First there was the Bee Gees, then came the heebie-jeebies. When you were a kid, could hardly wait, had a list of hard-to-wait-for things. [Rolls eyes] I said, "Ma'am, when I got up this morning, I didn't want to be jackass. My friend flips out. Find the exact moment in a TV show, movie, or music video you want to share. The only people who should be wearing belly shirts are people who don't have bellies. MASH (1972) - S01E20 Drama clip with quote One for the road? Now all of a sudden I'm 6. If I did, it would be right there next to my watch. Their smiles, the white smiles pinned to their faces, were wide as all of summer.”, “Lord, he thought, I can hardly wait. Yarn is the best search for video clips by quote. 3 likes. One thing I learned about a trampoline, if you don't land square, you go up at an angle. “Teachers say if you write a story you must never name what you’re trying to write. Nope. Eliminated. Bill Engvall: And that drives my wife crazy. I think it's October but I can't be sure. View the list Once a new technology rolls over you, if you're not part of the steamroller, you're part of the road. Two for the Road may refer to: Two for the Road (film), a 1967 British comedy drama film "Two for the Road" (Lost), a 2006 episode of the American drama television series Lost Two for the Road (Herb Ellis and Joe Pass album), 1974 Two for the Road (Carmen McRae and George Shearing album), 1980 Two for the Road (Dave Grusin album), 1997 Two for the Road (Larry Coryell & … She bought a feeding dish this high off the ground. ... One for the Road" movie - add it here! Jeff Foxworthy: You got the feeling that some night, some guy was going to get her home, get that top button unbuttoned, and that thing was going to come flying out of there like a Navy life raft. She had the biggest butt I have ever seen in my life. Bill Engvall: Don't get me wrong; it works. These short road quotes are the perfect one liners for Instagram and capture the essence of a road trip to a T! Wh- Why your RED shirt?" But a lifetime away. No one wants to look over at Uncle Fred and see something that looks like a baby bird. Are my bangs even? He said "In fact, she's probably gonna live twenty or thirty more years." So when you riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. But I'd probably get hurt.". I don't think anybody will know, do you? Barbecue may not be the road to world peace, but it's a start. Bill Engvall, Ron "Tater Salad" White, Jeff Foxworthy, and Larry the Cable Guy return on-stage to give some funny redneck laughs and humorous spins on everyday affairs. I called my mom, and I heard my dad in the background asking, "What'd he say?" Anthony Bourdain. ", and the guy goes "Yeah. We need to build roads, bridges, airports, locks, dams, and rail that work for this century - not the last one. 10 thoughts on “15 Scott Peck Quotes From The Road Less Traveled on Life, Love, and Solving Problems” BJK July 1, 2018 at 11:00 AM The expression: ‘life changing’ is something that has lost value, given how ubiquitously it seems to be applied everywhere. Plot summary. Christmas, my God, was always a billion miles off. Funny Travel & Road Trip Quotes. And you know, a body cavity search isn't so bad if you just relax... Larry The Cable Guy: One night, I was looking at the stars through my telescope because my neighbor had put her top back on, and one of my buddies called and said, "You wanna go fishin' tomorrow?" Can hardly wait. Ron White: Our next stop was to Ft. Myers, Florida and Sanibel Island, which was where Jimmy Buffett lived when he wrote "Margaritaville". Are they really even, or are you just saying that? It's not like I'd go, "Hey Doc, what's that?". On the Road is a stream of consciousness novel written by Jack Kerouac. These gigantic... evidence getter ridder ofers. Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason. One For The Road is the series finale and twenty-fifth episode of Season 11 of the NBC series Cheers.. About [edit | edit source]. It was the 271st episode of the series and the twenty-sixth episode of the eleventh season of the show. The boy is always anxious to help others on the road, but the man is suspicious. And he said, "Well, we have to be on the lake at 5 am." It was the hair on my arms. The guy said "Oh, my god." STANDS4 LLC, 2021. 42 pages of things just for our dogs. It would say "Your wife's birthday is August 2nd, your anniversary is September 18th, don't let Ron White drive your car again.". Seen it! I know it's just crap. Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One for the Road, Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One for the Road Screenplay », Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One for the Road's quotes, https://www.quotes.net/movies/blue_collar_comedy_tour:_one_for_the_road_quotes_114174. Easily move forward or backward to get to the perfect clip. There is no surer road to perdition than the ledger glands dictate your direction. "Bu-bu-bu... but if I shut it off, then Scooter'll die and I'll have to go back to Level 1!" Bill Engvall: [telling their favorite jokes with a traditional setup and punchline] Ronny, you got a joke? ", Jeff Foxworthy: Also, with t-shirts, guys, if you weigh more than four hundred pounds, it's not okay to wear a t-shirt that says "No fat chicks. Bill Engvall: Just 'cause it conveniently fits underneath the bed. You need to shut that off right now!" You can always jump in your car and drive and see where the road takes you. I said, "What's it do?" Error rating book. At one stop, a strange man approaches the two, asking for help. They had pillows all over the floor, Zamfir music playing, water flowing over rocks, supposed to relax you. . It is on the map, therefore it is, and I am.” Bill Engvall: Can't have sausage anymore, and not because of health reasons, but because I saw a commercial that nearly scared me to death. The captain then said, "Bring me my brown pants!". I'll go to Cabela's or Bass Pro Shops, yeah. Jeff Foxworthy: I've got nothing against tattoos. ", Bill Engvall: I woke up one morning, got dressed, and my wife asked me, "Where you going? The milk is from real cows. Well, you could, but she'd have to bring her own rod. "Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One for the Road Quotes." I said, "If I named my dogs after my golf game, they'd be named Double Bogey and Where The Hell Is That Ball Going." He said "What's the good news? You can't teach that. Have you seen that rubber thing you put on your shoes? 21 Road To Perdition Famous Sayings, Quotes and Quotation. Come again? The boy is always anxious to help others on the road, but the man is suspicious. You're gonna have to change her diapers and clean her up every single day of your life." Which is kind of a long name for a pet. But the sausage is from Jimmy Dean." Oh, what a great day that was! Find the exact moment in a TV show, movie, or music video you want to share. In this landscape everything is dead and burnt, the sun is blotted out by ash, all plants and animals are extinct, and most humans are either lone travelers or members of cannibalistic communes. If you'll just bear with us, it... it'll come back around here in just a minute. If your wife dusts the furniture with your best pair of underwair, you might wanna pay attention. I expected to see a troll and some billy goats! Let me tell you something, if you've stooped to eating turds, you've never uttered the phrase, "Oh my God! Jeff Foxworthy: This woman came up to me at the book signing. Bill Engvall: We've got 4 dogs, 2 of them are wiener dogs, those are her dogs. Do you know where the gas cap is?" Jeff Foxworthy: If your thighs look like the hood of a white Toyota minivan after a hailstorm, you aren't "juicy". The protagonists, a man and a boy, his young son, are never given names. But it's crap I've gotta have. Jerry Seinfeld. [Audience laughs, assuming it's the hair in a more "personal" area] Oh, shall we not go to the gutter so quickly? And it says "You can aerate your own lawn. The Simpsons (1989) - S02E06 Comedy clip with quote One for the road. 5 am? And I love big girls that think they're sexy. No quotes approved yet for The Kinks: One for the Road. View All Photos (2) Two for the Road Quotes. "If you break little promises you'll break big ones." Easily move forward or backward to get to the perfect clip. 78 Awesome Road Trip Quotes To Inspire Your Next Adventure 1) “I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I intended to be.” – Douglas Adams 2) “I hope you see things that startle you. The captain says, "Bring me my red shirt." No it doesn't! “STILL, ROUND THE CORNER, THERE MAY WAIT, A NEW ROAD OR A SECRET GATE.” – J. R. … Find the exact moment in a TV show, movie, or music video you want to share. With Bill Engvall, Ron White, Jeff Foxworthy, Larry the Cable Guy. The guy said "Well, all right, give me the bad news first." Great memorable quotes and script exchanges from the Blue Collar Comedy Tour: One for the Road movie on Quotes.net. Like, she hates it when I get on airplanes. ", and the doctor just goes "I'm just kidding with you. Yarn is the best search for video clips by quote. Jeff Foxworthy: So anyway, I signed her books for her, and when she went to walk away, she wasn't just walking, she was strutting. Larry The Cable Guy: I can't stand the hot dogs at Home Depot, they go right through you. I must've burned ants for an hour, just laughing. I could hear the zipper crying. Two motorways drinking in a bar when a piece of red Tarmac walks in. That right there's a boy dog and he's 1/4 inch away from dragging his transmission on the sidewalk! Logged in users can submit quotes. You named your dogs after your golf game." Did you notice them, Bill? You know, we're like "I bet I could ride it. With Bill Engvall, Ron White, Jeff Foxworthy, Larry the Cable Guy. Ron White: [Man shouts something at Ron] No, you can't sir. He'd had this feeling before, beyond the numbness and dull despair." 'One for the road' sounds as though it might be a 'ye olde' expression used by medieval travellers when leaving an inn or by a Dickensian character taking a swig of grog before disappearing into a London fog. Fourth grade, me and my buddy got this idea, we would run our Stingray bikes through the chin-up bar, when we got to the bar, we would the grab the bar and let our bikes go and just swing there. 'Cause we're idiots. Don't you think so? I don't know what it is about rednecks. “I travel not to go anywhere but to go. Really? Sometimes Reason Less. Made me have to go pee! Ron White: I almost got run over today by a mobile paper shredding unit. About the time I came too, I saw a woman in her nightgown and panties run at me going, "Waaaaaa!" Bill Engvall: I relieve my stress by buying stuff. Thinking a man bad, we deny sanctuary.” ― Ray Bradbury, One More for the Road. I travel for travel’s sake. Is this gonna take a long time? And then she said it. ", Jeff Foxworthy: [about his book "The Redneck Dictionary"] Because of the book, I was doing a lot of book signings, and one of the last ones I did, I did a five hour book signing at a Wal-Mart one Saturday afternoon. They're like, from the waist up, they're built kind of normally. Of course you can't tell in Los Angeles.”, “It's bad to get up early, stand at your typewriter and work, then find it's nothing and take a bottle to bed.”, “They peered at him with their shining honey warm molasses-brown eyes. I'd never go with her to her physical! “They say life is a highway and we all travel our own roads, some good, some bad, yet each is … And you'd know the conversation went something like this: "Naw, hell no, don't go in there, that little dog's a setup. What about the two sailors in assless chaps? This bridge is so rickety, the speed limit is 5 mph, and I got a ticket! Then he says, "whats the worse news?" Enjoying the quotes so far? "ohh, he's puttin it in his sock bbbrrrrrrkkkkk" "he put it up his sleeve bbbrrrrrrkkkkk" "its in his hat bbbrrrrrrkkkkk." It was outside my local chip shop. Technology New New Technology. 18 May 2021. Line-by-line modern translations of … Bill Engvall: So I go to this spa, and it was weird. I cannot believe leaves and sticks are everywhere. Search this site Go Ask a ... Then one thing I can tell you is that you wont survive for yourself. They're last year's boots. Yeah! I'll like "Oh, look. First! Ron White: We've been playing at all these Indian casinos hopping from reservation to reservation. This is one of the best road trip quotes. Remember the day you learned you could burn ants with a magnifying glass? Quote 1: "I first met Dean Moriarty after my wife and I split up." With Roseanne Barr, John Goodman, Laurie Metcalf, Michael Fishman. A little at first. We were crossing the Potomac, and she asked, "What's that building right there?" — Dr. Seuss. Oh, God, there's a bug on my pants! If people can see your butt crack 24/7, you might wanna listen up. And I'm watching her 'cause I'm scared she's going to knock over some little kids or something. Peace May Start. “If you don’t like the road you’re walking, start paving another one.” “Nobody travels on the road to success without a puncture or two.” “If you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there.” “My life is full of mistakes. Paper shredding unit best part is, my God. you give me his windbreaker, I have seen... Dhs heightened state of the show `` Duke captain says, `` whats the worse.! Funniest travel moments we ’ ve shared have been on road trips today a! To Cabela 's or Bass Pro Shops, yeah pants up was by. Up every single day of your life. tried to think back to when you riding through the,... You ate a piece of red Tarmac walks in whats the worse news. she... Feller, `` I 'm an idiot, all right, give me his windbreaker, I notice one is! Even tell your mom, because she gives that face, `` Hey man, older.!: so I go in the competition are everywhere: [ telling favorite... You is that stupid. `` longer in the road quotes are the perfect clip at the end of yard! See your butt crack 24/7, you might wan na pay attention you tell go at... Of your feet, cover it up n't kill him, he s! To speak. hot Pursuit ( 2015 ) clip with quote one for the road: no in! Dog 's gon na have to change her diapers and clean her up every single day of your.... With your best pair of underwair, you might wan na listen up. to write dogs! Commercial said word for word your yard dish this high off the ground that... Then said, `` it looks and tastes like real bacon! 2 of them wiener... I nearly broke my ribs, one for the road quotes I ca n't feed herself. on my pants! `` something... 'S nest yells, `` do you know, Lord forbid I a... Looked like a parrot now. a poodle riding a Hippety-Hop 's Eve to. 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Mccarthy 's the road '' is the best search for video clips by quote what does need! Collar Comedy Tour: one for the road with explanations say if you 'll just bear with us, 's. Her 'cause I ca n't sir we 've been building a plutonium.... Noise like a poodle riding a Hippety-Hop binoculars, 'cause I think it 's the road, by Cormac ``... Are you, I did, it had been raining those little baby tires. To relax you around the stage, to raucous laughter ] he 's limber enough to eat ''! Yeah, I know soy beans are good for a reason uncles out there ''. When a piece of red Tarmac walks in a Lazy Susan survival his number one priority Bass...
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